Roscoe Says

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Go Rangers!

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So does my friend, Jeri.

Even though they lost…

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Of Baseball, Beer and Baking…

2013-04-21 14.15.59Today, I road tripped to Arlington to witness the Rangers massacre the Mariners.  It was the perfect day for baseball.  If you aren’t a fan, I can’t fully explain the sheer joy of being in a stadium in person. The thrill of every sight and sound. The negation of crappy food and beer by the wonder and history of the sport, by the community of the crowd.  It is a thing of beauty.

But I ramble.

 

Earlier in the week I purposely parked myself at a nightmare college town sports bar counter.  They always, always show the Braves game. I know when to choose my battles –  Except…

This happened –

 

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Beer foam art. Who knew?

Were it St Paddy’s Day, I would have found it funny.  For some reason, that particular evening, it came across as far too kitsch.  Maybe I’m just a cantankerous old lady.  Either way, I’m talking about it, so it worked on some gimmicky advertising level or other.  Even more annoying.  (Heh). 

 

Quick mention – Not only did I troll my favorite music store for Record Store Day yesterday (support your independent stores, people!) but I also caught the Meat Puppets this week. And yes, they still rock like crazy. Their new album is worth a listen. And then another. But no time for reviews here.

I’ve been remiss in reporting on things educational as of late.

“Bread is the paper of the food industry. You write your sandwich on it.” Dwight Schrute

  The gist:

Last week was the end of the general culinary introductory block, which meant our first kitchen practical. 

Cooking tests are interesting beasts. In preparation I grocery shopped specifically for the dishes on which we were graded, including three deceptively normal looking whole chickens to practice fabricating.  Once unpackaged, I discovered I had brought into my home overgrown foul of supervillainous proportions.(The quality of store bought chicken is often truly shameful). I stored most of the giant slabs of chickenish flesh in my freezer for future use.  Test day,  I found myself questioning everything I did, being gun shy in regard to seasonings, and (maybe over?) simplifying.  It didn’t help that we were being judged – I mean, graded – by an instructor who had not taught us in the block.  But we all survived and no one seems to have been poisoned. We moved on to this week’s intro to baking, during which we learned how to make fourteen million different kinds of bread, some pastries, a cake, and on Friday – a baguette practical and {eek!} cake decorating.

Ladies and gentlemen, why I’m not a pastry student, Exhibit A:

 

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Passersby had so much clever commentary on my choice of frosting color – Grinch, Oscar the Grouch, banana leaf and guacamole green. All fitting.
I personally called it snot green.  The strawberries didn’t look quite as boogery as I’d imagined though –  As a classmate of mine recently observed, they’re called the culinary arts for a reason.

{We’re all friends here – Confess something at which you’re less than skilled. It’ll be painless, I promise}